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Saturday, March 22, 2014

Fred Phelps, one of the most hated men in America is dead, an eviction notice is in order.

URL - http://theghousediary.blogspot.com/2014/03/fred-phelps-one-of-most-hated-men-in.html

Reflexively most of us say good riddance!  Someone on the facebook wrote that he wants to know where Fred Phelps will be buried, so he can go spit on his grave!  Death of these rascals is a reminder. What did they gain from their hatred for fellow humans? What did he take with him? Nothing! Instead, he left behind ugliness as his legacy.  Should our hate for him make us mirror him? 

Years ago, I approached a restaurant owner friend for concessions on dinner plates for a non-profit event; savings were to benefit a charity. They guy barked at me endlessly and screamed, “I have worked hard for my money, and so should others, I am not going to pay a penny for the damned charity let them pay.”  Finally, I had to ask him to shut up and just say no, and be done with.  Three months later, the guy was in a car accident, and the stop sign pole ran through his face to the back of his head killing him instantly.  My first response was shameful, but then I recovered quickly and mumbled to myself, “I wish you had given that concession, now that you are gone,  I will forgive you, but will not forget to tell the story to others."   

Forgetting is not an option; we simply cannot forget men like Pastor Fred Phelps. Indeed, we need to remind others like him that they will be remembered in a similar way; disdain.  I am not sure people like him would say – why did you not tell me about this before,  had known this, I would not have been an ass. Don’t we encounter these men and women every day? Do we say anything to them?

Forgiveness is central to all faiths.

Justice can be viewed as the ultimate harmony and balance between the subject and the elements that surround it, be it matter or life. Disturb that balance; everything goes haywire, until a new balance is attained or restored.

There are two sides to every equation – the receiving and giving. On the receiving end of the equation, the hurt is emotional or physical. When one is hurt physically, it has to be healed through medicine or physical therapy to restore the balance, but when it is emotional or spiritual; several options are available to be free including revenge, forgiveness or sulking forever.

Revenge appears to bring justice, but really not. It negatively bonds you to the hated, instead of mitigating your tensions, it aggravates your balance and causes you to brood, sulk, and seethe with anger towards the giver of such hurt.

Here is how it works; when my late wife was about to go under hospice, I started working with her in tying the loose ends of her life so she can be free from apprehensions.  One of examples was about an individual who had cheated her in a business transaction, she was angry at him and rightfully so, and said a lot of things to him on the phone despite my suggestions to move on. For years, she was seething with anger whenever she saw him, indeed if we entered a social gathering, either he sneaked out or we walked out. I called him up, reluctantly he came, and the two sought forgiveness and cried, what a relief it was for me to see my spouse become free again. It was not merely uttering the words but acknowledgment of the wrong doing on one side and letting it go on the other without consequence ( If you wish to read the full story, I will send you the link).
 The Spiritual freedom is indeed the greatest achievement in one’s life and it permanently clings to you till eternity. Those of us, who can free ourselves from tension, pain, anxiety, apprehension, hostility, malice, pressure, tension, stress, strain and conflicts, are showered with blessings of peace and joy.

The humble option is Forgiveness. It will release us from bonding with the hated one, and helps us move on with life.  Let me assure you - forgiveness releases us.  It was central to Jesus’ teaching; Jesus loved us and wanted us to be free, and the teaching is same in every religious tradition.  In Quran, God says that the dearest person to him is the one who forgives, and adds, I am willing to forgive you, and you need to forgive others, it is for your own good.

Eviction Notice to Fred Phelps

When you give an eviction notice to a squatter (an unwanted occupant), not only he gets evicted, but will also be not forgotten, it will go on his or her record. I urge my fellow Americans, particularly Jewish, Gays and Lesbians and Hispanic immigrants to evict him from your hearts, but not forget him. (
Standing up for Jews, Gays and Immigrants - http://www.huffingtonpost.com/mike-ghouse/standing-up-for-jews-gays_b_650167.html ) Let him not cause your blood to boil, you should not give him that power. Evict him from your hearts and be free.

Sincere forgiveness benefits you the most, not him.  

I will not forget Fred Phelps, but will forgive him. I want to be free, free to do good things for fellow beings.  I had countered him at the Dallas Holocaust Museum, Texas Jewish post, Akiba Academy and a synagogue and few other places.  Pictures at

In behalf of Muslims, I gathered many of the Holocaust survivors together in the Museum, and did a short Pluralism prayer asking God to give him sense. As I walked out of the Museum, there was a Jewish Kid holding an equally hateful placard – I asked him not to display, thank God the kid obliged while the elders looked on nodding an approval. We also prayed the Pluralism Prayer in front the Akiba Academy.  I have to find the videos and more pictures and my write up.
I will be writing a full article on this to be submitted to Huffington Post.

May God help us to be civil and help us forgive him, and not become like him, Amen!
Please note: My book, “Standing up for others” will be released in April on Fox News. There is nothing like freedom!

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Mike Ghouse is a
speaker, thinker and an author on pluralism, politics, peace, Islam, Israel, India, interfaith, and cohesion at work place. He is committed to building a Cohesive America and offers pluralistic solutions on issues of the day at www.TheGhousediary.com. He believes in Standing up for others and a book with the same title is coming up. Mike has a strong presence on national and local TV, Radio and Print Media. He is a frequent guest on Sean Hannity show on Fox TV, and a commentator on national radio networks, he contributes weekly to the Texas Faith Column at Dallas Morning News; fortnightly at Huffington post; and several other periodicals across the world. His personal site www.MikeGhouse.net indexes all his work through many links.

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